I can remember the day we first met Harley. His owner was a woman named Sandy, and his name was Chico. He was scared and Sandy was trying so hard to get rid of him but he wasn't cooperating. I immediately felt a connection with him. A few weeks later I went to a doctor's appointment with my mom and sister, and Harley was at home with my dad and his friend John. We came home and Harley was hiding between the shed and the fence. My dad had been trying to get him to come out but he was afraid of men because his previous owner's boyfriend had abused him. I went to the crack where he was and he came to me. That was when I truly knew that Harley and I were going to be more than dog and owner.
People have always criticized my relationship with Harley. They said I was a psycho for loving him so much, but what they never understood was that Harley was so much more than a dog to me. Yes he was clearly an animal, but I swear we understood each other. There were times when I just knew what he would say if he could talk, and he knew what I was thinking and feeling. Even after the worst of days, that dog just knew him being by my side would be the secret to making me feel better. I think it was impossible not to love him. Yes, he attacked all of my friends, but there was something about him that people fell in love with. His intelligence was amazing, some days I think he was smarter than me.
As most of you know, Harley died on May 5, 2009, or Cinco De Mayo. I think it was the perfect day for him to go because of his Mexican heritage. The hardest part so far has been trying not to let go. I gave him so much of my life, and I truly believe that I would not be who I am today without him. Most people will never understand my love for him and that's okay, it was a special kind of love that many people won't ever get to experience. Harley chose me to be his best friend and he was always there even when I wasn't there for him. I hate that I had to decide when he left this world, I always thought he would go when he was ready, and maybe he wasn't ready... I will never know for sure. Every night for three years I would come home late from either church or work and he would be waiting in his bed by the back door for me, and as soon as that door handle turned he was up and ready to get in the big bed with me, and even though he has been gone for a while I still expect to see him waiting for me when I come home.
I am scared of what the future holds for me. I know that the pain will subside as time goes on and I will eventually get to the point where I don't even think about him, but right now I'm just not ready for that day to come. I don't know if there is a doggy heaven or not, and I'm sure that dogs don't come back as ghosts, but I can't help belive that somehow Harley is looking over me. I have spent so much of my life with him I think a part of him will always be with me, whether he lives in my memory or in my heart... Harley Davidson Terry will always be a part of me.
I am so thankful that God blessed me with Harley. After Harley died my mom asked me if I could ever go through the pain of losing another dog and the answer was plain as day to me. Yes the pain sucks, but the time spent and the love shared makes it so worth it. I would not take a single moment spent with him back. God puts people (and sometimes dogs) into your life to teach you and help you, and part of that is loss. I have learned so much from Harley about myself. I know that someday I will make an amazing wife and mother, and I know that I am capable of unconditional love. I will miss Harley every day and I will never forget the amazing memories I made with him. As crazy and psycho as it sounds, Harley was my best friend and I will always think of him that way.
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